Porky's Place

Women DO Suck at Parking.

German scientist Dr Claudia Wolf decided to test whether or not the “prejudices” about the female sex’s disastrous parking habits were a matter of objective reality or mere sexism, so she carried out a study and discovered that all those stories about women’s lack of parking ability are more than the chauvinistic ravings of cranky old patriarchs.

According to Wolf’s study, not only do women do a less accurate job of parking than men, but they also take 20 seconds longer to go about it! No wonder the average female chauffeur makes 25 cents less than the average male chauffeur! Someone has to pay for all those dings and knocked-over fire hydrants!

And according to Germaine Greer, Australia’s most hated export and the closest we have ever come to exacting revenge against the British for the whole Gallipoli thing, it’s partly the fault of ….Tits! Apparently the problem is that women have breasts that make it harder to turn around! Christ, what claptrap! Most women don’t have breasts anywhere big enough to make a difference when it comes to turning around – what’s Greer living in, a Russ Meyer movie dominated by Amazons with triple Ds? In his prime, Arnold Schwarzenegger carried more meat on his chest than most women ever will, so I guess he and every other Mr Olympia must have sucked at parking!

Greer also claims that the study was pointless, but then she would, wouldn’t she? The reason this study is anything but, is that it shows that certain sections of society have done for women something that is never done for men – they have portrayed a real flaw as mere sexist myth. How often do men get that kind of treatment? They don’t. With men, even if all the evidence is against the myth, the myth is allowed to stand. After all, the way the world views men is not anywhere as great a concern as the way it views The Important Sex.

Take note also of the way that the Daily Mail, a right wing paper, seeks to placate the feminist crowd by inserting a totally unrelated bit about Evil Testosterone having wrecked the economy! That’s why this is such an uphill battle, both sides of politics are hell-bent on kicking men in the face and patting women on the head every opportunity they get.

More here.

And as further evidence of how apocalyptically bad womens’ parking is, here is a video of how it’s done by a Canadian woman old enough to know better, but not old enough to blame it on senility.

For those wondering what a Russ Meyer movie is, here’s a poster for Supervixens. It kind of speaks for itself…

Tags: Funny Stuff
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